Worry in a Good Way
By Kathy Atkinson
“Worry does not empty tomorrow of sorrow - it empties today of strength.” Carrie Ten Bloom
Think about a time when you played over and over in your mind the worst case scenario. Your spouse or child is late coming home. You worry that they may be in the ditch, in the hospital or worse case dead. Your imagination runs wild with thoughts and ideas about how bad things could be.
This happened to my husband and me when our daughter began driving. It was difficult to watch her drive off alone. Our imaginations came up with all kinds of images of horrible things happening to her. Obviously, we needed to do something to address our worry. That is when the cell phone, for us, became the greatest invention ever. We became solution oriented, not problem oriented.
A client recently shared with me that she used to worry about what would happen if her car broke down on the turnpike. Instead of worrying about it every time she used that highway, she decided to take action and ask the tollbooth attendant what would happen and what should she do. Now she feels comfortable knowing what to do if that problem ever arises. She became solution oriented, not problem oriented.
Another client was going to have an elective surgery and began worrying about all sorts of things that could go wrong. We worked on addressing all the worries that arose and played the “what can you do to make sure that isn’t a problem” game. We covered things like making sure she was comfortable with the surgeon, making sure she had someone to take care of her during her recovery and making sure she had someone to take care of her cat while she was laid up. She become solution oriented, not problem oriented.
Some of our worries are a total waste of time and energy.
A friend of mine recently became a grandmother. When she heard that her daughter was in labor she began to worry about all sorts of things that could happen to her daughter or the new baby. In this situation there was absolutely nothing that she could do to address any of her worries. It was totally out of her hands.
In this case, she needed to spend time worrying in a good way by imagining that everything would turn out wonderfully. She needed to focus on the solutions that were already in place...her daughter had a great doctor, she was in a hospital that was prepared for any situation, and the mother and father had prepared themselves as much as possible. She needed to let go of her worries and have faith that everything would turn out well for all concerned. If something did arise, she needed to trust that it could and would be handled.
So, do something about the worries you can address and let go of everything else that is out of your control. That is how you Worry in a Good Way.
Next time you catch yourself worrying about a person or situation, stop and come up with some solutions that will make you feel empowered. Become proactive. What actions can you take to eliminate your worry?
There will always be man-made and natural disasters. Do what you can to prepare. Have emergency supplies ready, create a plan, know where to go in case of an emergency, then let it go. Worrying will not change anything. If something does happen, trust yourself to be able to handle it.
If worry is your constant companion, I encourage you to use EFT to address your worry head on. Visit www.EFTdownloads.com for more information about EFT and the downloads I have created to address worry about a person and worry about a situation.
I am smart enough to find solutions to my every worry.
I have the ability to send out loving thoughts to everyone I care about.
I have the ability to release my worry about things I cannot change.
“If things go wrong, don't go with them.”
"It only seems as if you are doing something when you're worrying."
Lucy Maud Montgomery
"You can't wring your hands and roll up your sleeves at the same time."
"For peace of mind, resign as general manager of the universe"
Copyright 2006, Creative Life Coaching